Saturday, May 17, 2008

Oh, Canada!

Once upon a time there was a land called "Canada." It was a beautiful land, as broad and fine and fair as the Lord God ever put upon the face of the Earth, and in it dwelt a people called the "Canadians." While few in number, being no more than the population dwelling in that foul realm then known as California, the Canadians were a people as fine and beautiful as their land, for all the men were bright and brave, and all the women strong and beautiful, and all the children above average.

And then, something terrible happened. A shadow fell upon the land; perhaps all those hippies and draft-dodgers who left the United States to settle in Canada in the 1960s put something in the water. For the Canadians turned away from all the things that had made them a strong and goodly people, and instead flocked to join the new Suicide Cult of Multiculturalism, and they drank deeply of the poisonous potion of Diversity. And in place of their fine land of Canada they attempted to raise a new nation, devoted to their false god and his vision of perfection, and they called this land, "Trudeaupia." And the refugees from the Canadian health care system began to come streaming south.

There are many tales that could be told of life in Trudeaupia. For example, there is one that is told of the time a young software engineer from Minnesota was sent by his employer to a customer site in Trudeaupia, only to be arrested by the Trudeaupian border patrol and held for a day in a cold and damp concrete cell, while his employer labored to prove to the satisfaction of the Trudeaupians that this young engineer had specialized knowledge required by the customer site and was not taking a paying job away from a native Trudeaupian. In time the employer succeeded in doing so, and the young engineer was released, only to return immediately to the United States, from whence he proceeded to mail the Trudeaupian customer a box full of diskettes with instructions to shove the diskettes up their rectums for all he cared.

But that is another story, and of no great moment now, for even Trudeaupia itself was but a dream; merely a brief resting place along the primrose path to perdition. For in the fullness of time the land completed its descent into darkness and became "Khanadistan"; a strange place where all sense and reason was banished and it was possible for a highly placed official in the so-called "Justice" Department to declare, in a court brief:
"Mr. Lemire complains that the prohibition against disseminating hatred via the Internet is not accompanied by the defences of truth and fair comment that are available to traditional news media in torts ranging from defamation to seditious libel. This argument is misleading. The defences of truth and fair comment remain available to torts such as defamation and seditious libel, regardless of the medium in which they occur. However, none of the traditional media can avail themselves of these defences in cases of alleged hate propaganda, whether the communication appears in print, on television or on a website.

"As the Federal Court has explained, defences that may be available in tort actions are not available in cases of hate propaganda because the prohibition is concerned with adverse effects, not with intent."
While the Canadians had never been great fans of free trade or free speech — the reason their nation produced so many writers, artists, and musicians was because of their protectionist Canadian Content Laws, and they had been known at times to seize printed publications and jam radio and television originating from their southern neighbor, the United States — in the above quote we find proof of their final descent into madness. For in the new nation of Khanadistan, it is now the official position of the government that truth is no defense against the accusation of hate speech.

Weep for the lost Canadians, my friends. But weep, and then learn. For the Suicide Cult continues to spread its foul tentacles, and this madness surely is coming soon to a land near you.

Most likely it will begin in Khalif'ornia...